You might say I've had a Dickens of a day.

Dead meat. That's what I was thinking as my #5 exhaust rocker was klacking away 30 minutes before they call KOH to the lane. I was dead meat. Down in the mouth I was - but not as bad as earlier in the day.

I had pulled into Irwindale to the sound of a terrible clatter. It sounded like a clothes dryer full of aluminum ice trays. I had installed the Comp Cams Stainless Steel rockers on my intakes and I was sure I had found a new way to screw up what should have been a simple project. The clatter was coming from the odd bank. I yanked the cover and discovered the #5 exhaust rocker loose as a goose.

I had removed this rocker, accidently, in a loss of focus - got distracted somehow. Happens a lot these days. I put the rocker back on and all seemed good first start with the new gear. But apparently these OEM rocker lock nuts are "use one time only". Crapola.

I was very discouraged. I had actually said goodbye, figuring I'd nurse it home and fix it for next week. But friends offered suggestions and encouragement. I took the nut off and gave it a beating. Mangled the last two threads with a screw driver. Spun it back on. The whole engine sounded funny - but not bad. Probably my paranoia.

I was anxious to try the new 4-link setup. First run the car hooked, jumped up and unloaded, and hooked again. A 7.44 ET - not bad. The RT was 0.465.
Not good.

For the second lap I dialed up the rear rebound damping from 2 clicks to 5 clicks to discourage the jumping rear. The problem with this is that more rebound damping also resists the tire hit I was looking for with the bar change. I skidded off the line and almost hit the wall. No bite what so ever. The RT on the aborted run was 0.477 - and the rocker nut let loose again. Dead meat.

I removed the nut and smashed the hell out of the top two threads with an ugly stick. Figured I was golden when the top threads hit the stud and I almost broke my wrist. But as I spun the nut further on it got looser. By the time it got where it belonged you could turn it with your fingers. Dead Meat.

John Pandeles generously offered a polylock. He broke it out of its virgin roller rocker packaging. Thanks John. I was up and running in time for KOH.

I'm facing first round with no green RTs, no traction, and no dial in. Dead meat. Tim Dolans pointed out that whenever I had pronounced my dire straits in the past I had won. He was correct - but that was usually because the track was so bad, and that is the great equalizer, when all the cars are struggling. Wasn't the case yesterday - or maybe it was.

First round I was desperate for a green light. I took three rings off my Terminator button, and wore my secret reaction time delay glasses to the line. It was dark - couldn't see a damn thing but the track is straight so what the hell. My RT was 0.542. Mike with the Mighty Mouse Dart was caught making breakfast on the line. Apparently his pop tarts sprung from the toaster just as the tree came down. 0.895 RT - ouch.

Second round was Kenny Snow. We sat at the line for about half a dog year while they sopped up the oily mess another overpowered rice burning mini motor sprayed down the entire back have of Kenny's lane. They need to stop giving those things enemas.

A 542 won't cut it with Kenny so I ditched the glasses and re-loaded the button. My perfect 0.500 RT was a good start. But my 0.001 (one thousandth) over dial in left the door wide open, for Kenny Snow. He couldn’t collect though because he was struggling to keep his pointy end pointed in the right direction.

KOH was only eight cars so third round was the finals. Several races ago, racing Eileen Pandeles, she had nixed the usual side bet on the pot split and I liked that so I've made it my custom too. Racing just for fun in the final round is, well...more fun.

Foot brake cars in the finals again. The blue Maverick is a good car with many KOH wins. They mark their wins on the Maverick's hood like notches in your gun handle. Finals losses get half a mark. The start was as good as even with 0.54 something RTs for each. My launch was monster however as I had found a sweet spot with my rebound damping. I was on a 7.3x run with a
7.41 dial so I caught him lickedly split and feathered the throttle to the stripe. The margin of victory was 0.0088. Damn good drag race.

I love drag racing. When I win my head gets all swolled up and I strut around like a peacock all week. It's like Viagra for the head.